After months, hell years, of frustration on the diet front I have decided to take the plunge and try the Atkins eating plan.  I read the Atkins Diabetes Revolution and Why We Get Fat:  And What to do About It and both offer very persuasive arguments for reducing high glycemic index and refined carbs from one's diet.  I decided that my half-assed low-fat eating plan wasn't working so I decided to give Atkins a try.

Right now I'm starting the Induction phase.  I plan to get blood work done on Wednesday so I can track my  progress and see if following this eating plan will improve my blood sugars and cholesterol.  I'm also hoping I can break my addiction to carbs - cake, cookies, candy, chips, etc.  If I have any chance of improving my health and losing weight then I'm going to have to stop binging on those foods.  It isn't helping at all.

It's funny, a friend posted a photo of my from 1982 on Facebook today and I was amazed when i look at it.  I was slim and attractive yet I have no memory of ever feeling that way.  I feel like I've wasted almost 30 years feeling fat and ugly.  I have no idea why.  I don't remember my  parents or family every making me feel that way.  I guess part of it was frustration because I wasn't built like my friends.  I didn't (and still don't) have a classic hourglass or pear shape.  I've always been more of a rectangle which was especially frustrating when buying clothes.  My friends wore smaller sizes than I did and their clothes always fit better.  I still have that problem - anything that fits my waist tends to bag around my hips and thighs - ACK!

Anyway, I'm hoping that I can stick to this eating plan and manage to get my behind in gear.  I guess we'll see what happens.

I've been a convert to seasonal color theory since first reading about it in a Readers Digest magazine sometime in 1982 or 1983.  When I read the article I had a sense that I was an autumn.  My skin is beige with a bit of a gold tinge and I tan in the summer if I stay in the sun long enough.  My hair is dark blonde with brunette and red strands woven through (or at least it was then - now there is more gray than red).  And my eyes are green with gold flecks.  So it was pretty much a no brainer to determine I was an Autumn, especially after trying on some Summer lip colors just to be sure - way too garish on me.

Over the last few years seasonal color theory has been refined to create sub-categories.  When I first read about it in Doris Pooser's Always in Style, I thought I might be an Autumn-Spring (of what might now be called a Warm Autumn).  And when I was younger with fewer gray hairs that might have been true.  Over time, and as my hair slowly acquires more gray strands, I am noticing that brighter warm colors (such as pumpkin, paprika, burnt orange) overwhelm me and leave me looking washed out.  I can still wear some deeper orange-brown shades such as clay and rust but the lighter, brighter ones don't work on me anymore. 

Now I could keep my coloring in the Warm Autumn range if I were willing to dye my hair but that's not an option for me.  I'm just not good at things that require a lot of maintenance and dyeing my hair would fit into that category.  I visited Taaz and gave myself a makeover  to see how I'd look with reddish-brown hair.  I don't think it came out too bad (although the photo wasn't the best to start with).  So it's definitely and option for me but I really don't think it's one I want to try.  Red hair can be a difficult color to maintain and I really don't want to give up all my natural highlights.  I really like my hair just the way it is, even if I do wish it wasn't getting lighter.

Besides the reality is that I can live without the burnt oranges, pumpkins and parikas in my wardrobe.  I'm not 100% sure they worked all that well on me anyway.

At one point I was a bit worried that I had completely analyzed myself as the wrong season and that I was actually a Summer of some variety.  That might have bene tricky for me because I really dislike some of Summers more pastel offerings.  I can deal with the plums and greens and browns but those pinks - ick! 

I have gotten some second opinions - although I will grant those were through photographs.  And although there was some discrepancies as to whether I'm a Warm or Soft/Muted Autumn, all agreed I was an Autumn of some stripe.  That's quite a relief because at least now I don't have to completely re-do my wardrobe.

Of course if that's the biggest problem I'm worrying about, things can't be that bad right now.

Outfit:  Olive V-neck banded bottom knit shirt (Lane Bryant), olive shorts (Wal-Mart), green plaid wedge-heel sandals (Payless), green gemstone necklace with bee pendant (Rachel Pollack).



Makeup:  Revlon Beyond Natural Skin Matching Makeup in Light-Medium, L'Oreal True Match Blush in Innocent Flush, Maybelline Lipgloss in Bronze Dragon, Maybelline Intense XXL Mascara in Brownish Black.

I have got to learn to take better photos.  The outfit shots are so blurry that it's hard to tell if this outfit works or not.  I'm pretty good with the shorts, but the top seems to look a bit baggy and shapeless on me.  When I tried a smaller size on at the store it was definitely a bit too tight.  Maybe it will shrink a bit in the wash (yeah, right). 

I found an old issue InStyle magazine while cleaning out some books and stuff.  I'm glad I found it - there were a few outfits I want to add to my inspiration folder.  It can be fun to look at older magazines and see what was being touted as the latest trend.  This issue is from August 2007 and focuses on jeans, white, Mandy Moore, Valentino and the best Fall shoes.  Some of the shoes are really cute and would look just fine now but some of the - not quite sure what they were thinking.

I'm on a color kick again.  I've been browsing various websites that address seasonal color theory and somehow I keep getting more confused.  Granted some of that might be due to the fact that even when it's being done by "experts", quite a bit of having your colors analyzed can be impacted by lighting, what you're wearing, etc.  I think because my hair is graying, it is reducing the amount of red and gold highlights in my hair.  I have usually thought of myself as an Autumn because my hair has definite red highlights and my eyes are an olive green with gold (a Warm Autumn if I'm forced to choose but I think the jury is still out on that one).  Then I see that women like Jessica Biel (whose coloring seems similar to my own) are classified as Soft Summer and I get very confused.  Perhaps it's just the photos I've seen but Jessica Biel's eyes seem to be a similar shade of green to my own and her hair certainly looks similar.  At the same time, I don't see myself giving up my autumn hued fashions anytime soon.  I guess ultimately it doesn't matter what someone else might think.  As long as I like the colors I wear and think they flatter me, that's all that matters.

Outfit:  Clay cotton-blend skirt & coral scoop-neck t-shirt (Old Navy), tan espadrilles (Chadwicks) and tan bead necklace (OOAK)



Makeup:  Revlon Beyond Natural Skin Matching Makeup in Light-Medium, L'Oreal True Match Blush in Innocent Flush, Maybelline Lipgloss in 610, Maybelline Intense XXL Mascara in Brownish Black.

Today was a relaxed and laid back day.  As both hubby's and my father have passed away and both our godfathers are gone as well, we had no real obligations for the day except to remember them.  We did that by sharing some fun stories and having pizza with the mom-in-law.

I have to admit I like how i look in this skirt.  I may have to find some more.  Who knows, this may open up a whole new fashion horizon for me.  The possibilities are almost mind boggling.

Outfit:  Brown knit shirt, dark brown trousers & tan plaid linen-blend blazer (both Lauren Woman from Lord & Taylor) with brown low-heel pumps and an amber necklace.



Makeup:  Revlon Colorstay Mineral Mousse makeup in Light/Medium, Jane Blush in Blushing Earth Sheer, Revlon Fabulash Mascara in Brownish Black and Revlon ColorStay Soft & Smooth lipcolor in Rich Raisin.

Today I had to attend a funeral with the hubby.  A friend's older brother passed away after a battle with cancer.  This is the second brother he has lost in a year and both from cancer.  Sometimes I really feel that I have spent so much time in funeral parlors that it's not funny.

I don't own any black clothing so my default for attending funerals or similar circumstances tends to be dark brown or olive green.  It conveys a similar sense of respect and somberness and doesn't require me to buy black.  Actually based on what I've observed at the last few funerals I've attended, those kind of restrictions don't seem to be in force anymore.  I just always feel better if I can make that effort.  Of course even I have to admit that sometimes it's just not possible.  It depends upon what my schedule is for the day and how much advance notice I have.  And I think the reality is that most people appreciate the fact that you manage to attend the services at all - attire becomes a lesser concern.

Outfit:  Teal blue V-neck t-shirt, putty skort, tan sandals (all Wal-Mart) with purple, blue and green glass bead necklace (Avenue).



Makeup:  Revlon Beyond Natural Skin Matching Makeup in Light-Medium, L'Oreal True Match Blush in Precious Peach, Maybelline Lipgloss in Blazing Brown, Maybelline Intense XXL Mascara in Brownish Black

Today was a bit of a reality check for me.  I started reading a new book called Pretty Plus by Babe Hope.  It's a fashion and style book aimed at the plus size woman.  The author covers most of the usual topics - body type, fit, shoes, fabrics, etc.  One unique approach the author took is to use various types of diamond cuts to describe various body types.  So, for example, instead of a triangle or pear you would be a pear diamond.  Instead of an hourglass, one would be a round diamond.  I had to decide whether I am a heart diamond or an emerald diamond.  So I asked my hubby to take a front view and side view photo of me to help me decide.  To say that reality can be painful would be an understatement.

Somewhat the facts that I can avoid during a quick glance in a mirror or in my reflection in glass came into clear focus while looking at the photo.  All I can say is "ouch".  On the plus side it helped me realize a few things.  Despite my heart-felt wish to be a triangle/heart diamond or an hourglass/round diamond, I am in reality an apple or at best a rectangle shape.  I may have a waistline but it is hidden beneath layers of extra "me".  I'm not stating this as a bad thing or a good thing (although I do wish I were in better shape) but it is something I need to make sure I address more effectively in my clothing and style choices.  Ironically quite a few recommendations for my body type end up making me look pregnant.  That's not quite the look I was aiming to achieve.

I have a feeling this is going to be a long-term process.  Figuring out all these little details while trying to improve the situation won't be easy - especially considering my avowed avoidance of exercise.  I may have to get off my lazy duff and do something.  Oh who am I kidding, I know I have to do it.  Otherwise I can't see this situation getting better.

Outfit:  Graphic tee with embellished neckline, jeans, green, purple & blue plastic bead necklace (Avenue),  brown sandals (Wal-Mart) and brown & clear plastic bead necklace (Avon)



Makeup:  Revlon Beyond Natural Skin Matching Makeup in Light-Medium, L'Oreal True Match Blush in Precious Peach, Maybelline Lipgloss in Bronze Dragon, Maybelline Intense XXL Mascara in Brownish Black

I found this shirt at Avenue and loved it on sight.  I tried it one and thought it looked pretty good, even in those sometimes evil 3-way mirrors so prevalent in clothing stores.  Somehow between the time I purchased this top and the time I actually wore it some bizarre alchemy occurred and it went from a cute Boho top to an aging hippie shirt.  Okay, to be fair I don't think it's the shirt's fault.  I think I just didn't pair it with the right pieces.  I still love the top but I won't pair it with a pair of jeans and sandals again - at least not these kind of sandals.  I'll figure out a look that makes this top work.  I like it too much to even consider not wearing it again.

Today I took Charla Krupp's book How Not to Look Old from the library.  It offers some interesting ideas (some not so new but interesting).  There is just something about Krupp I can't warm up to.  I suppose that is not her fault as much as it mine - I don't respond well to sense of "high maintenance" I get from her.  It doesn't take away from the fact that she offers some good tips but not enough to make me want to own the book.  I much prefer Christopher Hopkin's Staging Your Comeback.  I think it comes off as a little less high end/high maintenance, which is more to my taste.

Outfit:  Peach print flutter sleeve blouse (Avenue), khaki city shorts (Wal-Mart), leopard print flats (Payless), wooden bead necklace (import store) and wood & red coral bangle bracelets.



Makeup:  Revlon Colorstay Mineral Mousse makeup in Light/Medium, Jane's Blushing Cheeks Blush in Blushing Earth Sheer, Revlon Fabulash Mascara in Blackened Brown and L'Oreal Color Juice lip gloss in Chai Love You.

I'm not sure how I feel about this top.  It's a different look for me - a bit more romantic and feminine than I usually wear.  I think I like the to but perhaps not with these shorts.  Perhaps it's better suited to a skirt.  Or maybe  a different pair of shoes would help.  I'm going to have to tweak this a bit to make the top work in my wardrobe.  Maybe I should focus more on matching the brown in it rather than the lighter shades.  Hmm, I suppose time will tell if this becomes a wardrobe staple.

Outfit:  Teal blue polo shirt & brown sandals (Wal-Mart), light beige pants (not sure).  Gemstone chip necklaces - sodalite, flourite and another stone I'm not sure about.

No face shot today because I didn't wear any makeup again.  I've already posted a few photos of my un-retouched face so I figure no new ones are really needed.

Outfit:  Gauzy bell-sleeved, Renaissance-style shirt (Old Navy), dark rinse jeans (Avenue, brown sandals (Wal-Mart), brown glass bead necklace (Lane Bryant).

Today I got my package from Old Navy.  In addition to this lovely blouse (the color is Tsunami - I love it!), I got two tank tops and a cardigan.  I have had quite a bit of luck with Old Navy's plus size line.  I'm disappointed that these items are only available online but I do think they have a good, inexpensive selection for larger ladies.



Another no makeup day - I was feeling extremely lazy.

Sometimes when I look at fashion magazines I become very frustrated.  It's not that I can't appreciate the appeal of a slim form - and how much easier it is to dress that form, it's that I am really fed up with being spoon-fed 20-somethings with very slim (sometimes almost anorectic) bodies, almost no figure flaws and a personal stylist and being told I can/should emulate that look.  Why the hell would I want to look like Lauren Conrad (and who is Lauren Conrad anyway?).  Are there no older women (maybe Sharon Stone, Cindy Crawford, Faye Dunaway or even Brooke Shields) these style magazines can highlight once in a while?

Okay, maybe I'm reading the wrong magazines.  I know More focuses on women over 40 but they don't have the kind of fashion coverage I seek.  My two favorites are InStyle and People StyleWatch - both of which focus on very young 20-somethings with very eclectic, boho or dramatic styles.  I would look quite the fool if I tried to copy those looks on this overweight 40-something body of mine.  Jennifer Aniston does seem to be a regular in these magazines too but her "style" seems to include copious amounts of black (not my taste). 

Oh who am I kidding, my issue isn't about the 20-somethings or the fact that most of these celebrities probably have stylists who help them put together many of these amazing looks.  My biggest complaint is that there are no more plus size magazines to showcase fashions for women above a size 0.  After all it cannot be easy living up to public expectations and continuous scrutiny.  I don't even want to imagine what it must be like to be stalked by incessant paparazzi and have your every weight change (regardless of how minute) relentlessly measured and reported.

I miss the days of BBW, Mode, and Figure.  I can't believe there isn't enough interest in a plus size magazine to keep one on the newstands longer than a year or two.  I guess I should be thankful for the internet.  At least there I can find stylish women who post their daily fashion photos.  They may not be celebrities but I find them much more inspiring; and their looks are more affordable too.